When someone tells you to find joy when things are hard, your first thought might be, “This person obviously hasn’t gone through anything very difficult in her life.” When we go through hard things we tend to fixate on the thing that isn’t working for us. It’s easy to become like a dog with a bone, determined to fix this thing that is “off” — a relationship, our career, financial issues, family concerns, a health issue, the death of a loved one, etc.
I’ve been through some really hard things, slamming me all at once, and I learned something significant — I could still find joy. In fact, my capacity to feel joy expanded during this time. But, I don’t believe it would have had I not discovered a very important secret… a secret I’d like to share with you today.
In my experience, what we resist persists. The more energy we throw at a problem, the more fixated we become, and the more the answer eludes us. The more you need a thing, the more likely that thing will run in the opposite direction.
I don’t know about you, but I have a hard time walking away from a problem. I guess I’ve always viewed walking away as giving up. And giving up looks a lot like failing or the coward’s way out. Yet, walking away doesn’t have to mean giving up. Even giving up doesn’t have to be permanent… it can be a temporary hiatus… a much needed rest that shifts our perspective.
After this hiatus we come back to our challenges with fresh eyes and often discover the answers were there all along — right in front of our faces. Or perhaps the timing just wasn’t right when we were wrestling with the situation and now it is.
Daily Hiatus
As I’ve been doing my Creativity Challenge I’ve realized we need daily “hiatuses.” Waiting to find joy until we have time is like waiting to eat healthy or exercise until we have time. Not keeping up with things on a regular basis leads to deterioration. If we wait long enough, we end up paying the piper. There are consequences for not eating right, not exercising, and YES… there are consequences for not finding joy in daily living.
Enjoying a hobby or a creative pursuit for the sheer joy of it relaxes our white-knuckled grip on challenges. It opens our eyes to possibilities… bottom line it moves us from confusion and fear to clarity and confidence.
Had I not turned to music during the hardest period of my life, I would not have gotten through it so gracefully. Music saved me. It may not be music for you. It could be crafts, arts, sewing, writing, poetry, drama, dancing, playing Legos with kids, whatever! There is some place you can find joy, and the best place to find it is in creativity.
How to Think Positive Even When Life Is Hard
We’re often told to think positive and to believe. Fixating on your problems rarely helps you think positive or believe. Focusing on our challenges usually leads to spiraling down a toilet of despair without an answer in sight.
Trying to find silver linings helps a little, but it’s way too much work. However, losing yourself in the joy of creation does give you something positive to focus on. It helps you believe … if even for a spell — that joy still exists! It doesn’t matter where your positive mindset originates, it will eventually infuse everything it touches.
Wanna join me? Come along with me on the Creativity Challenge and infuse something creative into your daily life. Be sure to sign up for my ideas, music and inspiration on this page. I look forward to hearing about your creations!
